“I just don’t like sharing guys”, says Mary, a contestant on The Bachelor Australia season seven.

It’s only episode two, seven days in and Mary’s all loved up and completely over sharing a guy. Remember, she’s consciously signed up for a show dedicated to competing with 20+ other women to win the heart of ONE man. We calmly ask, what did she expect?!!

With that frustration suppressed, we’re ready to share the top five things you missed, or maybe just want to relive from The Bachelor Australia’s second episode of season seven.

1. Sogand is a front runner. 

We don’t like to gloat, but we called it in our first episode recap.
Osher glided into the lady-clad lounge room to grace the contestants with the highly anticipated single date card. With only the hint of ‘we may not always speak the same language,‘ we knew it was down to three, and we saw Sogand come out on top, leaving self-proclaimed ‘China girl’, Kristen and French-speaking Helena disappointed.

We have to hand it to the producers, they’ve definitely upped their romance game. The first single date saw a formal wardrobe change, numerous chandeliers, a 15-piece orchestra (we counted) and a blushing and speechless Sogand. It was elegant, thoughtful and a refreshing touch to the show. But have they spent too much of the budget too soon? If we see an overload of the predictable beach-frolic dates or cheap cheese-board picnic we’ll know.

But, to top the date off, Matt gifted Sogand the first rose of the evening, which she took full advantage of by stealing the first kiss of the season. Watch out Mary – let the drama begin.

2. Emma can’t handle the heat.

After Sogand returned to the house she dramatically spilt the goss to the ladies, feeding their worst fears and fake cheers of support. But for one, it was too much. Emma was disgusted in hearing everything that went down on between the spark-filled couple. In fact, she was so upset, she said that there was “nowhere to escape from it all”. Emma, we suggest you pick yourself up and head to one of the other hundred rooms that make up the MANSION you’re living in.

3. We’ve got some new ladies.

Yes, apparently less than a week with 20 women didn’t prove entertaining enough. Whilst the ‘original’ contestants and the bach were all out on their archery date, hoping to get struck by cupid’s arrow, eight new botoxed ladies flaunted vibrant and textually confusing outfits that exposed as much skin as possible entered the mansion.

To make it better, the ‘originals’ were forced to watch the new arrivals awkwardly waddle their way in (clutching their mermaid-tail dresses) towards the hopeful man of their dreams. It was the longest 10 minutes of awkward airtime filled with uncomfortable flirting, sheer judgement (clearly from us as well) and bitchy commentary. But, what we found the most uncomfortable was that the remaining 18 original contestants were expected to share one bowl of popcorn as they watched on…

New contestants on The Bachelor Australia 2019. Image via Channel 10

New contestants on The Bachelor Australia 2019. Image via Channel 10

4. Sogand is NOT the only Persian princess in the house.

Amber alert, Sogand, even though she has a rose, has gone into complete meltdown mode and downs her champagne, and order’s another, as she can’t fathom competing against another female of Persian descent.

5. The cocktail party was more than we could hope for.

Was it exciting? No. But did it feed our need for cattiness, awkwardness and drama? Yes.
The great divide was evident, the hateful eight vs the ‘originals’. But what was more entertaining were the plans to combat each other and secure their place in the competition. From taking girls aside and ‘distracting’ them in another language, to girls tapping in and out like they were the interchange on the sideline, these ladies were doing whatever they could to grab Matt’s attention.

But things really started to heat up when Osher announced that there were six, yes six, loved-up lasses leaving the house. And to rub more salt into the wound, Matt announced three of the new girls as safe in the first four callouts. Including crazy/entertaining Vicky, who rocked up as a cheerleader…

Best line: 

Rachel: “It was like a bad-batch of shit cake”
We weren’t aware there was a good batch.

Significant Departures: 

Nope, six lovely ladies who never scored any airtime.

Biggest Jaw-Drop Moment: 

Vicky’s entrance, dressed as a cheerleader screaming “What’s up bitches, Mamma’s home”.

Feature image The Bachelor Australia credit: Channel 10